Sexual discrimination has been found a common practice of Nepalese society as revealed in Nepali folk songs. Such discrimination has cripled the equal status of women in a typical Nepalese society. Nepali speaking society is predominantly patriarchical. This implies the suppression of women in all aspects of life. The Family Law of Nepali speaking peoples expresses lack of equal treatment between a male and a female member. The same behavior of a male is easily tolerated but it becomes a matter of utter intolerance if it is the case of a female. The female member can be ruthlessly punished and even outcasted.
This analysis is based on 101 festivity songs of the Rapti zone of midwestern Nepal. The data show that a daughter is not wanted when a woman in the family is not even pregnant. Everybody, even the mother, wants to bear a son. e.g:
- ekahalaa putra ko baradaan dinuhos
‘O God, please bless me with a son’ (ChhaiTi git 1.1.1:1d)
- chhoro bhani hereki, chhori po rahichha
‘I looked at the baby expecting it to be a son, but to my displeasure, I found it to be a girl’ (Ratyauli 1.3.3b)
The birth of a female child is considered unfortunate. The mother is considered guilty if she begets a daughter or if she does not have any issue. She gets ill treatment from the moment of delivery of the daughter, e.g:
- chhori jaabi raangse laai khara le baane hunchha
‘It may not be improper if the worthless daughter is tied with a straw rope’ (Ratyauli 1.3.3c)
- maarsi chaamal raakheki chhu, alikati bhaat pakaai-deu
chhori jaabaa paauni le, kaanchaa khaae hunchha
‘I have reserved some Marsi rice of rough variety. The woman who begets a worthless female baby should be served with only a little rice and in that it will be justified even if the rice is served undercooked’.
Early marriage and polygamy are other problems a female has to face, e.g:
- 5. pipalu kaa boTa muni baali-kanne khelchhin
hina hina baali-kanne, bukwaa ghasne belaa bho
‘The little bride is playing under the Pipal tree. Come, little bride, it’s time to massage with turmerick and yoghart to have a bath in preparation for the wedding ‘(1.2.10 bukuwaa ghastaa ko maagal git).
- gaaun-ghar kaa keTi kherchha, sandhain nayain khojdai hinDchha
‘(My husband) keeps on teasing other village girls and is looking for a new wife every day (Ratyauli 1.3.1c) ‘
Polygamy is tolerated and sometimes even justified on the part of a man, but it is strictly forbidden on the part of a woman even if she is widowed and oppressed by family atrocities, e.g:
- 7. maasu-maasu taruni laai, ma laai haaD chusaaunchha
estaa sanga basnu bhandaa aase raanDi basumlaa
‘My husband serves flesh or meat to other young girls, but he suckles me only bones’ (Ratyauli 1.3.1d)
The female has only duties, but practically no rights in her family. She is like an unpaid labourer. She suffers from discrimination in the equal distribution of food, labour, responsibility and decision making and gets bitter criticism, sarcasm and satire in most parts of her life, e.g:
- 8. ghaansa-daauraa gardaa-gardai biti-go jiban
man ko dukha man ko marma bujhne chhainan ghar maa
‘My life is going to end only by cutting grass and firewood and in the family there is none who shows sympathy’ (2.2.8 last lines)
- 9. rundai rundai gaera baleni maa basne ho
kas ko mukha herera bhitra pasne ho?
‘When I reach home weeping, my feet stop before entering the house, because there is nobody in the house who welcomes me with love and sympathy’ (2.2.18d)
- 10. gagreTaa maa herna jaandaa gaagri Dhaleko
sasuraa ko mukha herdaa kaalo nilo andhero…
paani ko gaagri lyaai baleni maa bisaaundaa
kasto bhayo holaa ma laai saasu risaaundaa…
bhaata khaana bhaansaa pasdaa makai Daalaa maa
Daalaa ko makai dekhdaa mana mero rundo ho
unki chhori tyastai bhae kasto hundo ho?
katinjela dukha sahum Darai-Dar ko bhara maa
haansi dina bitaaunu chhaina ghara maa
‘When I returned home late in the morning after cutting grass, I found the water pot empty. Father-in-law’s face was unhappy with me. I picked up the pitcher and brought water, but how do you feel when you she your mother-in-law unhappy and unsatisfied? When I was ready to eat in the kitchen, I was given a basketful of maize to grind in the mill. I only think how would the parents-in-law feel if it had been the case with their daughter? How long can I survive in an atmosphere of fear like this where one has to pass life without even smiling?’
Polygamy has further intensified and multplied the oppression of women in a typical Nepalese society, e.g:
- 11. ghara-ha pai jaaum bhane, saanimaa saasu
bana-ha pai jaaum bhane, bagheni khaalaa
aajai bhayo rukha muni baas
‘If I go home, I remember step my mother-in-law. If else I go to the forest, I fear a tigress may eat me. It is therefore that I passed night under a tree’.
The problem of co-wife is clearly generated by the practice of polygamy.
There is double standard and discrimination even at the issues of sexual right and the reciprocal sincerety between the husband and the wife. One song in the data describes a husband stealing his wife’s valuable ornament of gold. The wife is suspicious that her husband may be spending that either on gambling or on concubines, e.g:
- 12. sirai laaune sirphua ta sandusai maa raakhi-ten
ughaari herdaa kheri, chhaina raajai
ki ta raajai le manai ki raani laai
ki ta khelyo raajai tiripaasaa
tiripaasaa kheli kheli, sirphul mero gai-sakyo
‘I had kept my coronet in the box, but when I opened the box, I found it had been lost. I guess my husband stole it and either gave it to his beloved or lost in gambling’
Parents’ home is the only source of warmth, sympathy and purgation for an average Nepalese woman to drain away her mental burden, but even on the occasion of the Tij festival she has difficulty to get permission from her in-laws to go to her parents’ home, eg:
- 13. tija maa pani maaita jaana paaina ra
roera bityo mero raata bari lai…
chari bharara, malaai samjhi roin aamaa jhamke saanjhai maa
‘I could not get leave to go to my parents’ home even on the occasion of the Tij festival. That’s why I passed nights weeping… I guess, even my mom may be crying in the evening in my memory’.
If she ever dares to violate the decision of her in-laws, she may even be socially downcasted. Thus, even her parents do not speak to her if they know their daughter has come violating the permission of her in-laws, e.g:
- 14. paari baaTa aaigin raitaalni cheli
aaphanai baabaa le mukhai herenan…
aaphanai aamai le mukhai herinan…
aaphanai daajai le mukhai herenan…
aaphani bhaaujai le mukhai herinan…
aaphanai bhaai le mukhai herenan
‘The girl came to her parents’ home crossing the river, but the parents, brothers and the sister-in-law could could not look at her’ (Tij ko git 2.2.10b)